Latest news - it is 2009 and the notes on this website go back to around 1994. They are still valid but we now have a much more up to date website devoted just to Voice Dialogue, Self Awareness and Self empowerment. There you will find all these pages (updated) plus many more new articles, new worksheets and more explanations and new pages are being added every week.

Can I suggest that you go to http://www.voice-dialogue-inner-self-awareness.com    to see our latest voice dialogue advice and information.

 

The troublesome ten percent

More action - less teamwork

For each of is there are some areas of our lives where we know that try as we will, we lack the skills or abilities we require, where we experience troublesome stuff ups or breakdowns and deep inside we know that we could have done better.

These are signs which tell you these situations are:

in some way the work of certain members of your inner self

and

that the activities of these relatively few inner selves repeatedly cause trouble out of all proportion to their number

and

that what they do can undermine much of the good work the rest of your inner selves is doing.

As you can see from the list below one of the basic problems with these few inner selves members is their lack of integration. This limits their ability to work as a team and adds other complications.

Characteristics of C type inner selves

Below are some pointers that tell you if a typical less integrated inner self has taken over or feels that it is ‘in charge’. The signs are much the same whether you are noticing your own, or someone else’s less integrated inner self

Although the examples are about spoken interactions, you could observe the same pointers if you were reading an e-mail, report or letter the inner self had helped write.

1. Do the words or actions being used by this self reflect polarised or unbalanced thinking? Less integrated inner selves (inner selves) think more strongly in terms of oppositeness or polarity (symbolised as +) thinking up or down, left or right, winner or loser. They describe things as:

one thing is good or bad; black or white the other is not

one thing is right, the opposite is wrong;

one thing must be done but the other must not

one way must work and the other must fail

Interactions with another person seem to push each into a position that reflects the view that either: ‘our power/resources are bigger than the problem’ or ‘the problem is bigger than our power/resources’ or the person switches back and forth between each of these two positions.

The level of power between two opposing inner selves appears to be clearly out of balance.

2. Is there a sense of opposition or conflict around what the inner self is doing and saying?

The lower the integration the less confident the self feels and the more then chance that they will see their opposite as a threat or point of conflict.

Less integrated inner selves (inner selves) usually size up an opposite number as an opponent or adversary and (in sporting terms) mark them accordingly (It may be on the same field or off the field (discredited inner selves (inner selves) ) or an inner self in another person, but which ever it is this sense of opposition and conflict affects how each one plays their game.

Like players on one side of a sporting team, less integrated inner selves (inner selves) don’t like to be on the sideline. They can be strongly influenced by and react with intensity in regard to what they think their ‘opposite’ inner selves (inner selves) are doing. Of course from the self’s point of view it is just trying to protect you from what it sees either as your lack of resources or from the ‘awful consequences’ in its eyes if the opposite team was allowed to get the ball.

3. Are there more than usual errors or gaps in accuracy, memory or perception? (Combined with above average insistence that it’s is not them (the inner self speaking) who is making this error)

The healthiest most integrated people make mistakes, forget, miss the point, or just don’t notice something in front of them. But a C type self’s patterns show up as more common occurrences of memories that are inaccurate or perception of events is that are distorted. Readily observable events may go totally unnoticed.

There is a saying that each C type self wears different glasses, a different watch, carries a different ruler, a different notebook, a different map of the world and each one uses a different kind of computer, a different operating system and even a different kind of keyboard.

After they experience lapses of memory or errors in accuracy they then exercise considerable vigour in insisting that it must be the other person’s inner self who is making the error (polarised thinking).

4. Are some of the spoken words, phrases or physical or emotional patterns familiar or repetitive?

Less integrated inner selves (inner selves) tend to be specialists who work automatically in response to events and therefore they have a limited repertoire of responses. Usually they react in the same way to similar situations. Many inner selves have difficulty varying their patterns.

Is there a familiar pattern or a particular kind of intensity or confusion?

Is this inner self trying to exercise control or stay in power in its usual way?

5. Are the ways power and control issues are being handled unbalanced or polarised?

• For example: If the less integrated self is a polarised A type it usually takes the view that ‘Our power or our resources are much greater than the problem.’ (Confronting, dramatic defending, over reacting to challenges, judging others or arguing about excuses,)

• If the less integrated self is a polarised B or C type it usually takes the view that ‘The problem is much greater than our power or our resources’ ‘

This can result in it working even harder (but following its usual style) to reduce anxiety or vulnerability? (Rescuing, surrendering, peacekeeping, pleasing, don’t rock the boat, giving up, giving in, playing victim or martyr, procrastinating, avoiding decisive action, avoiding decision making, even blocking stronger inner selves who want to get on with things)

6. Is the less integrated self putting too strong an emphasis on ‘doing’ things?

The words the self is putting into your mouth or the actions it has you doing are about someone else, what that person is doing, about their actions or the impact of what they have done or said on you.

Is the talk mostly about why another person should do differently or ought to change?

7. Is the inner self focusing on taking action around just one issue?

Less integrated inner selves (inner selves) like to focus on single actions and outcomes rather than allowing time for planning or asking questions.

8. Does the inner self as it talks, projects a want, a need, an intention, or concern related to the hoped for results of their communication

The level of energy related to this intention may be strong or weak, but if you can see, hear or feel some kind of pressure relating to the intention, this suggests a less integrated self is involved

9. Is the inner self’s unbalanced view or level of confusion noticeable enough to have an impact on other people?

Is the viewpoint or confusion more intense compared with what you might expect in this particular situation?

or

Is the viewpoint or confusion noticeably less intense or unusually quiet compared with what you might expect in this particular situation? (See Cannons, Crucifixes, Concrete or Character)

Each of the above problem characteristics are in part related to the basic nature of C type inner selves which typically includes some or all of the following.

• C type inner selves: are strongly influenced by what they think their "opposite" inner selves (inner selves) are doing

• Although all of them are within one person several self’s can all hear, feel, and see the same incoming event, each self can experience in incredibly different ways

• Each one will then report what they experienced as if it was totally true and accurate and will resist efforts by others within or outside who suggest another possibility.

• They make mistakes, get things wrong, mishear what is said; ‘wish they hadn’t said that…" but don’t like being told they are wrong

• They were designed to respond rapidly and automatically to a problem or event, not to pause first and consider their actions.

 

   

Feedback - please e-mail  me John Bligh Nutting -   at   nutting@growingaware.com


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